Thank you.
Okay, night like this,
I almost feel bad I don't pay taxes.
How does that happen?
I actually do work here.
You don't do anything, and I don't even make half that.
Why is that?
Well, I think I can answer that question for you
with one button.
No. BJ, that...
We serve food.
Hello, thank you.
You're welcome. Now just imagine
if you weren't wearing a bra how much you'd get.
How much did you get? Five.
- Five, that's $2.50 each. - Hey.
What's a man got to do to get a stiff drink around here, huh?
Okay, quickly, please, what do you want?
Ooh, that's a good question. Something strong.
What do I want? I definitely need to unwind.
Not too strong though, 'cause then I'll be on the moon.
Sweet, sweet would be nice. Sugar on the rim.
Sour is good, too. I love that pucker.
See, now you got me, boo. You guys!
Lemon Drop. Virgin Lemon Drop.
Ooh, lovely.
I love you, Ben!
I love you, Toad.
Dude, you're missing
and insane party, by the way, Kate.
How'd you guys meet?
We met on the way in.
I love that son of a bitch. Yeah.
I don't understand what the big deal is with birthdays.
You know, I mean, my 26th is coming up in a few days,
and the last thing I want to do is go crazy.
I mean, like,
give me a little three-hour nap,
a little aromatherapy bath time.
That's some serious partying.
You know what I mean?
Did you guys hear that?
Have to be deaf not to.
Dude, I know my sister.
Kate is down on Toad's 21st birthday because she never had
one of her own. Oh, well, why not?
9/11, that's why not. Wow.
No, Tommy.
That's not why not? No, dude, you need
- to get your math straight... - Are you sure?
...okay, before you throw that card out there. Yeah.
I think I did the right math. That's a big card to lay down.
That's a big card. Okay.
Kate had Maddie by the time that she was 21. Oh, of course.
We need to throw her the party that she's never had.
I love that. That's a fantastic idea.
Right? Wish I had the funds to contribute.
You know, it's been... Oh, all right.
Yeah, we can cover it. Yeah? Yeah, we got it.
Thanks, guys. It's just been so quiet in here,
and, um,
it's been a tough month.
It's been just totally dead in here.
Okay, all right, yeah. We got it. Okay, great.
I'll just hover. Kate's birthday! Yay!
♪ Wake up, look around ♪
♪ There's a feeling today ♪
♪ Fall down, get up again ♪
♪ Get in the game ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ We're all here anyway. ♪
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD www.addic7ed.com
All right, Kate's 21st birthday party 2.0.
All right, let's just throw some ideas around, see what sticks.
How about mermaids? Maddie, wake up.
No one wants mermaids when they're 21. My mom does.
Can you even spell mermaid?
Go on, spell mermaid right now
and we'll all get on board.
M... Yes?
U... And moving on.
It's tough to see you choke like that.
What are you guys talking about?
Your mermaid party.
- It's not a mermaid party. - We weren't even...
Who even said anything about a party?
I did not say the word "party." Yeah, what party?
Nobody said party. Literally all of you
just said the word, "party."
Baby, will you go brush your teeth?
Okay. Come on, dude,
you got to let us do something for your birthday.
Come on, Kate. No.
It'll be fun. No.
Kate... Come on.
No! You guys, no more wild parties.
That's not me anymore.
Dude, but you and your friends used to go crazy.
Please, you guys, I just want to do the same thing
I do every year for my birthday.
You've told me what you do every year since you were pregnant,
and it kind of sucks.
It's my birthday today.
Mmm-hmm.
Can you say, "Happy birthday"?
Come on.
I know you want to say, "Happy birthday."
It does not suck.
Dude, it sucks so bad.
You'd never find me
in an ice cream place alone on my birthday.
Just let me do what I want to do.
Please promise me you will not throw a party.
Fine, I promise...
sss...
What was that? What?
Were you just gonna... I'm sorry?
What was it?
It sounded like you were trailing off,
like you were gonna finish that sentence
once I shut the door.
Mm, no, no.
I didn't hear anything. No, yeah. No.
Yeah, you were trailing off.
You were like, lingering on the... on the "S."
No, I didn't. No. That's a weird thing. No.
No party.
No? Okay. No.
I promise...
sss...
Okay.
...to find another way to make her birthday awesome.
I saw what you did there. Nice.
I know just how to do it, too.
I'm gonna call Molly. Who's Molly?
Molly is Kate's craziest party friend from high school.
Oh, cool.
Yeah, she's a lot of fun.
Oh, she was fun,
always telling jokes, dancing,
stealing from dudes named Tommy.
Dude, are you still upset about the 20 bucks she owes you?
Okay, it's not the amount, and it was 15 if you must know,
it's the events that surround said transaction.
What events?
BJ, I'm gonna remove my glasses
so you can understand how serious I am.
Wow.
I need you not to ask me about that.
Okay, I'm so weirded out by what's happening right now.
So we're gonna go
buy some balloons.
Don't you look at me like that.
Wait, what are you doing?
We're going to Tommy's parents' house to drop off the buzz kill.
Yeah, but this route you're taking,
I can't go through this neighborhood.
This is where Darcy grew up.
Too many memories. Darcy, your ex-girlfriend,
Darcy? Yeah.
Are you seriously gonna make me turn around?
No, I mean, I-I can handle it, okay?
Stop the car! My God.
Stop the car!
I'm going to. Stop shouting.
It's okay, it's okay.
It's okay. Oh, man.
Sorry.
I just...
Darcy's parents are moving.
You know that Darcy and I
planned on living in that house together?
We called it our dream house.
That's your dream house?
Yeah.
What a teeny-weeny dream.
Yeah, we actually planted a tree in the backyard together.
Oh. Yeah, we were gonna...
You know, we were gonna get married and... Yeah.
Live together and...
Then when she passed,
I was gonna carve a canoe out of that tree
and then take it out to Lake Placid
and scatter her ashes.
Aww.
You thought she was gonna die before you.
We both did. Right.
Ben, don't be too hard on yourself, you know?
Yes, you're single and unemployed
and living in your sister's garage,
but at least you... You know?
Sorry, I can't think of anything.
I've got a lot of irons in the fire,
you know? Yes.
The day that my salad delivery system hits,
I could buy like, ten houses.
All I really need is just some place to carve out the canoe.
Surprise!
Oh, my God.
Ben!
No, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no. Ben, I said I didn't want a party.
Dude. This is not a... Where's Maddie?
Oh, she met a guy. Yeah, she's at the movies.
Dude, relax, she's at Tommy's parents' house.
Welcome to the 21st birthday party
that you never had.
Come on, let me give you a tour.
Okay, so we've got beer pong.
Whoa, I almost tripped over this.
What the heck? What is this? Did you put tape on the trim, Ben?
It says, "Open door for Kate's biggest present of all."
A present? Three exclamation points.
Is it a present for me? What door?
Maybe the bathroom?
Okay.
Best brother of the year.
Oh, my God! Happy birthday, Kate-y Cat!
Molly!
Happy birthday.
Hi. My God, I'm so happy to see you.
I can't believe you're here. Happy birthday.
I wouldn't miss your fake 21st birthday for anything!
Oh, man, so much fun.
Kind of wouldn't have happened if I hadn't put it together.
Feels like I should be part...
Okay, okay, do you remember the last time we had tequila
in Tijuana, we got in that huge bar fight.
No, that was not Tijuana, that was at Quesadilla Charlie's,
and you were punching the mirror.
And I beat that mirror's ass, right?
No, I don't think I should have that.
ŸPorque? Because I'd rather have this!
Ew.
You did it, Ben, and I must say
you're taking the news about Darcy's house really well.
You know what, life goes on, Tommy.
Why shouldn't some nice family enjoy that beautiful home?
What do you mean "nice family"?
Darcy's moving in with her husband.
What?
But that's our dream house.
Oh, my God.
That's exhausting.
I can't believe how good you look.
Oh, my God.
I missed you. I missed you, too.
Well, now that your brother's back,
there's no excuse not to hang out, okay?
Okay? Yeah, oh, my God, yes.
You're so right, yeah. Yes, because Uncle Ben
can do the day care,
and Miss Molly can do the night care.
Yeah, the night care.
That's really funny.
Come on. Okay.
Come on.
I can't believe Darcy,
moving into that house with that stupid, super likable husband.
That's my house.
That's my tree.
I was gonna carve that canoe with you
and then go with you to spread her ashes. Thanks, man.
Shameless.
Just shameless. What? The $15?
Dude, just go ask her for it.
Shut up.
Hi, BJ.
I need to borrow your car.
Why? I'm digging up a tree.
Oh, thank God. I'm coming with you.
Come on, let's get out of here.
We're gonna go find you a man-shaped birthday present.
No, I think we should stay,
'cause I'm having a really good time.
And I don't think I should leave my own party.
Yeah, you can. Ben is here, okay?
'Cause we need to take it to the streets right now.
Okay, well, let me just check on Maddie really quickly,
because she's been asking a lot of heaven questions lately.
Mm, okay, let's do it from the car.
Can I... Are we okay to drive?
I'll drive.
Yeah.
Oh... there she is.
Okay.
Hey, old girl.
Daddy's here now.
All right, come on.
What? Let's do it.
Ben, dig it, dig it, dig it.
Come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.
Sorry.
Take that, Darcy. No, I can't do this.
Yes, you can. Come on.
No, I can't. No. It's why we're here. Come on.
This is rubbish.
I'm gonna steal this tree and then what?
Come on, it would be so funny.
What, are you scared? No, I'm not scared.
Why are we here then? It's not gonna matter
to Darcy... she's moved on.
I'm the one that needs to like...
What the hell are you doing?
Ben?
Hey.
Ben?
Hey, Darce.
Why did you break her window? I didn't want to see her.
- Oh, didn't you? - No. Didn't you?
Maybe.
You did.
Okay.
This guy.
Great.
Here we go. Oh, lovely.
So we'll see you later? What?
Why don't you get out of here, huh? What are you saying?
I'd like to be alone with Darcy.
Get out of here.
Um...
I'm just gonna have a snoop around the place,
if that's all right.
Awesome.
So...
Mmm, boy, that's delicious.
Is that a Colombian roast or an Ethiopian,
kind of a, maybe a Sumatra?
Tastes fair trade.
My husband loves coffee in the evening, so...
Little too watery.
Not a big fan, actually.
Ben, what are you doing here?
I don't know, I just...
When I heard you guys were moving in here, I got pissed,
you know, and I thought that, for some reason,
digging up that canoe tree would make things even.
There's no even, okay, it's not a competition.
Nathan is my husband now.
Yeah, but he's living our dream.
Oh, God, Ben.
Okay, look, being with you was...
it was always so much fun.
We had so much fun.
Yeah. Yeah, but
I never took us that seriously.
You're, you're kind of this, like,
traveling unpredictable circus, you know,
and I'm sorry, I never saw us building a life together.
How can you say that?
This is our dream.
No, I, I think that that was your dream.
Um... hi.
I don't think I've, uh, formally introduced myself
and I'll continue not to,
um, but
may I just say,
when you dumped Ben you made
a colossal mistake.
BJ... I get it.
I know he's not much to look at.
He's got this crazy,
lopsided face,
but trust me, one of these days, believe you me,
he is going to come out of the woodwork with
a huge... salad.
It's more like a salad delivery system.
He's gonna deliver an insanely delicious salad.
We're experimenting with just a couple different kind of prawn.
So go ahead, call him a circus, because if he is,
I want a ticket.
I do.
I want a ticket to the Ben show,
front row.
Yes, please, sign me up,
even if it's not that good a circus.
It's pretty mediocre.
BJ. Yup.
Where are you going with this?
I'll tell you where I'm going, Ben.
Because when that circus goes to the next town,
guess who's there once again, even in this economy?
Me...
I'm there, front row.
Everyone knows me.
"All right, BJ, how you doing?
You want the 'yoozh'?"
I'm like, "Thanks, Omar, I would actually, yeah.
I'd love another ticket."
A few minutes later,
front row seats of this tired, sad, old circus.
I don't care, the magic is about to begin.
Ben, what-what's going on here?
I don't know, I don't know. Darcy,
do you want me to tell you what's going on?
So you didn't see
the potential in this weird,
freaky clown, but let me tell you,
I did, and that is exactly
why I chose him... as my lover.
You did? You know I did.
Do this.
Ow, ow.
Oh, okay.
I'm sorry
you had to find out that way.
Okay, give me two secs.
The bouncer loves me, I'm gonna get us in for free, okay?
Free's good; I know you hate parting with money.
Dude, why are you so mad about that 15 bucks?
Okay, it's not about the money.
It was what I was supposed to do with it.
What could possibly be that important? Come on.
Seven years ago I was going to take you out on a date,
our first date.
I didn't have much... just $15
and a plan that involved multiple coupons
and an intricate system of bus transfers.
Then Molly begged me for a 24-hour loan.
I think you can guess the rest. I started dating
Colin Manning.
And you dated him until you left for college.
Then, at college I met Maddie's dad.
There was a window, Kate, and Molly made me miss it.
I don't know about that because back then I just...
I saw you as my older brother's friend, you know.
Well... how do you see me now?
Well, I mean, now I, I, I think you're amazing and...
Well...
Kate!
Why is Molly yelling?
Hold on. And... Kate!
And what? Molly.
And you want to just be friends?
And you want to get married and have ten babies?
I need you!
You know, I'm, I'm single. No, it's not going to work.
What's wrong? Are you okay? Yeah, I'm great.
I need 40 bucks for this man.
40, really, that's the cover charge for this place?
Geez, Louise, there must be, like,
a lady that's in a cage in her underpants
that's all wet that's, like, whipping
their hair around so it sticks across their face.
Wow. What are you talking about?
You know what I mean? Okay. Just give him 40 bucks.
This isn't like a sexy thing.
It's just where I keep my safe money.
Don't tell people that.
Have fun, baby doll. Thank you.
Did I just buy drugs?
Kate, shh.
Am I buying drugs right now?
Am I holding drugs? I'm holding drugs in my hand.
Okay, keep it down. I would like to stop holding these drugs.
Please, sir, can I have a refund?
I would like a refund. You know what?
That's a good idea. I'll get us a refund. Hey.
Run!
Hey, hey!
That girl just took my money.
Oh, well, then, you are never going to get it back.
Oh, my... Kate, wait up, girl!
Hey! Kate!
- Hold up. - How are y'all running so fast?
Oh, God, I do not remember that bouncer being so big.
What the hell did you do?
And what the hell were
you going to say? I was gonna
buy us some drugs but didn't have any money.
Drugs? Yes, it was going to be awesome.
No, not awesome.
Kate-y C, we are back, okay?
Oh, my God, what are we gonna do tomorrow?
I'm gonna need a moment to myself.
Molly, I can't be doing that.
What are you talking about?
We can go crazy any time we want
now that Ben's back to help you out.
No, that's not it.
I just, I just... I don't want to.
Kate, okay,
you need me.
When was the last time you had any fun?
Last weekend.
I went to the Ice Capades with Maddie,
and it was awful and I loved it
so much I cried, I did.
But this isn't me.
This is not me anymore.
Like, look at me.
My whole life has changed.
I've changed completely.
I'm a mom now.
I'm a mom and it's awesome.
So, what, we're not going to be friends?
No, we will always be friends.
Always? Yes, always.
Always. Okay.
All right.
Well...
Thanks, BJ.
It's all right. Nah, I mean it.
Thanks. Aw.
I mean, all that stuff was
really weird that you said and totally bizarre,
but, like, I know
it was supposed to be nice, so thank you.
I just think, Ben, that you can dream bigger
than a dead girl in a canoe.
You know? Yeah.
That's all, yeah.
Thank you.
Good night. Good night.
Night.
See you.
Wow, looks like someone had a crazy 21st birthday.
I would not know, I wasn't here.
What, you bailed? I bailed.
What do you... what happened?
It's a long story.
Actually it's not really at all.
I stole a tree from Darcy.
Where's Molly?
She went home.
We're kind of
in two different places now.
It was a bumpy night.
I'm sorry I threw you the party.
No, it's okay. You know what?
Come with me.
It's almost dawn.
But I have to clean... Come on.
Okay, yeah, well, okay.
Good morning, Pearl.
Thank again. Any time.
I love you, Ben.
I love you, Pearl.
You are out of control.
Well, I can't argue with that.
Ice cream for breakfast. Yum.
Not that happy.
Ah, we should have done this in the first place,
you know.
I just didn't want you to spend
another birthday alone.
I was never alone, Ben.
It's my birthday today.
You want to say "Happy birthday."
Come on,
just say "Happy birthday."
Oh.
Yum. Come on.
I know you want to say, "Happy birthday."
Happy birthday, Mommy.
Thanks, baby.
Why does everybody know Pearl?
Yeah.
Come on, don't eat the whole lot.
This is the truth right here, mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, my God.
Should we make a move? Come on.
Come on, guys.
It's your birthday, Kate, I got it.
It's what guys who you think
are amazing yet only see as friends do.
Well, it's $25.
Why don't you use it to take somebody out?
Just make sure that it's somebody
who appreciates you for how incredible you are.
Somebody like me.
What the hell does that even mean?
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD www.addic7ed.com